


An Ace and A Hole

by orphan_account



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Acephobia, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-06
Updated: 2014-06-06
Packaged: 2018-02-03 16:03:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1750442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In a society where sex seems to be an inevitable part of a relationship, it can be hard to come out as asexual--especially when the question of moving in with your boyfriends comes up.  Acceptance seems far-fetched and impossible at times.</p>
            </blockquote>





	An Ace and A Hole

**Author's Note:**

> So, I'd really like to read more things where one or more characters fall under the Ace umbrella. Not necessarily with plots about them being asexual. But this one was important for me to write with what it has.

When Ray had first figured out that he was asexual, all sorts of insecurities bubbled up in his thoughts. Growing up, the same life plan had been drilled into his head—date, marry, have children, and somewhere along the lines sex would happen. In fact, he was expected to have sex; probably a lot of it at that.

‘Sexual incompatibility is a major reason for a relationship breaking down.’

It was a statement that he read somewhere on the internet, several times in different places, and while he didn’t know how accurate it actually was, he hadn’t seen anything that soothed his anxiety over it. People certainly seemed to believe that it was, and everything Ray saw that was against the idea simply said that sex could be enjoyable with one’s significant other regardless of ‘perceived sexual compatibility’ as it was referred to.

Nothing about what if one part of the relationship was completely repulsed by the idea of having sex.

So he fell in and out of relationships quickly. Afraid that it would put an insurmountable barrier between the people he dated, Ray kept quiet about his sexuality. Not that it mattered. It wasn’t long before it was over—sometimes the other ending it, sometimes Ray, sometimes the both of them in agreement on it. Once, with a girl that he thought that he loved, he finally came out and told her that he wasn’t interested in sex. His heart was pounding, his blood roaring in his ears as he spoke, afraid that she would hate him for it.

What she did was somehow worse.

After listening to Ray stammer out his confession, there was a brief silence. Then she actually began to laugh. As if what he had just said was nothing more than an amusing joke. He felt his ears burning in humiliation as her laughter died away into occasional giggles.

“What are you laughing for? I’m being serious!” he protested, cheeks flushed a bright red. Sure, he tended to joke around a lot, but this wasn’t one of those times, and it hurt that she would even think it was.

“Sorry, sorry.” As she swallowed back her giggles, she definitely looked anything but sorry about laughing. “I understand you just aren’t ready for sex yet, but that doesn’t mean you’ll never want to.”

For a second, he opened his mouth to defend himself. All protests died on his lips, seeing the disbelief in her eyes, her smile telling him that she did not take his confession seriously. It was no use. No matter what he told her to prove that it was different from simply not being ready, he knew she wouldn’t accept him.

The relationship ended less than a week later.

After that he was hesitant about revealing his asexuality to anyone, even to the people that he dated. Ray told himself that it didn’t matter, as long as the subject of sex never came up, as long as he just insisted that he wasn’t ready. It didn’t really matter that he would never be ready… right?

Yet even though he told himself that, it still felt like a wall in the relationship.

*********

Ray had been dating the guys for a while when they asked him to move in with them. Geoff, Ryan, Jack, Michael, Gavin… they always made him feel welcome and safe and accepted. He was tempted to accept the offer right away. But something stopped him. If he moved in with them, the question of sex would no doubt come up.

He had to come clean sometime. So one day after work, he caught Geoff before he could go home. “Hey, Geoff, can I talk to you?”

Geoff stopped, turning back to look at Ray. “Huh? Yeah, sure, what’s up?” he asked. Gavin, who’d been tagging along behind him, stopped as well.

Although both were very important to Ray, the idea of having to come out to two people at once cowed him. He ducked his head, fidgeting with the end of his shirt. “Can I talk to you alone?” he asked, before realizing how it might sound to Gavin. He looked up quickly. “Sorry, Gav,” he apologized, locking eyes with the Brit for a brief moment before glancing down again.

Out of the corner of his eye he saw Gavin wave off his apology. “Oh no problem. I’ll catch a ride home with Jack or Ryan.” He looked to Geoff. “See you at home.”

“See you, Gavin.”

Then finally they were alone. Ray fully intended to start the conversation, he really did. He shifted nervously, opening his mouth, not finding the words he wanted, and closing it again. Suddenly it was a lot more difficult to speak, when he was so sure that he’d be able to get out what he wanted to say. For a while, Geoff remained patient with him, hands shoved into his pockets as he waited for Ray to speak. And the silence stretched on, until Ray was almost ready to tell him to never mind whatever he was going to say, and just go on their way. This was a bad idea.

“So, what’s up?” Geoff prompted him when Ray didn’t say anything.

Ray sucked in a deep breath. “I—I was thinking of taking you guys up on your offer.” He looked down, playing some more with the hem of his shirt. “To, you know, move in with you guys. If that’s alright, I mean.”

When he glanced up again, Geoff had the largest grin on his face. He looked so delighted, and Ray felt his cheeks bloom with heat at the sight. “Really? That’s great! Of course it’s alright, we’re brought it up in the first place didn’t we?”

Dammit, those butterflies dancing in his stomach were going to be the death of him. He ducked his head. Shit shit shit. Now was the hard part. “But there’s something I’ve got to tell you first…” he said, his voice dwindling to nothing. Suddenly the ends of his shirt seemed very interesting to him.

As if he had flipped a switch, the mood changed. The elation that was emanating off of Geoff froze, slowly deflating, but not completely disappearing. “Oh? What’s that?” He sounded nervous at whatever Ray was going to tell him.

Another sharp inhale. It was now or never. “I’m not really interested in sex.” His words came out in an almost-squeak. He was terrified of how Geoff would react. “I’m asexual.”

“Oh? Is that all?” Ray dared another glance up, afraid to find something mocking in Geoff’s demeanor. There was nothing, just that loving smile, genuine as ever, unperturbed by Ray’s revelation. “I was actually afraid you were going to say that you didn’t actually like one of us or something. That’s not a thing, is it?” Now he actually appeared concerned that Ray might not be into one of the other five guys.

Ray flushed, mortified that something like that would be even considered. “No, of course not! I love all of you,” he quickly assured the older man.

Geoff nodded, and the concern was once again replaced by a gentle smile. “Good. Listen, Ray.” He placed his hands on Ray’s shoulders, drawing him into a warm hug. Ray came into the embrace willingly, relaxing in Geoff’s arms. “It doesn’t matter whether or not you ever want to have sex with any of us. We love you, and I know the others will say the same thing. We don’t want you to move in with us just for convenience or sex or whatever you might think. We want to spend time with you and live with you. Because we love you, Ray.”

The acceptance was unexpected. He buried his face in Geoff’s chest, embarrassed of the tears that were stinging his eyes. Ray was happy, and so so relieved. No way was he going to start crying now.

But the emotions in his chest was overwhelming, and later he would explain to the others, alongside of Geoff in the house he’d be moving into, why exactly the front of Geoff’s shirt was wet.


End file.
